My Own Joy Dare

When I was a young girl in school, the teachers would give each student a character trait award.  A fancy piece of paper and my name being called as a good thing?  That was definitely fun for me growing up!   But more importantly, it was an opportunity for the teachers to share what good spiritual fruit they recognized in your life.  I have no clue if my mom still has those papers somewhere, but I do remember this: I was awarded joyfulness at least a few years.  May be I had a bubbly personality; may be I liked school so it was easy for me to be happy there; may be I had a wonderfully blessed childhood so it was easy for me to be joyful, period.  A few years after leaving the school, I was speaking with one of my former teachers.  We were reminiscing over all the fun times, and he shared an insight that I cherish - a key to this whole joy thing.  He said, "You know why you were such a great student and stood out?  It's because you had the best lookout on everything.  You came in the first day of school and said, 'This is going to be the best year!' and then you made it happen.  You chose to have a great time."

Fast forward to college.  In my final two quarters of the education program, we were set up with student teaching assignments.  Our master teacher would allow us to take over classroom responsibilities, teach subjects, and "play school" in order to prep us for the real world.  In the course that partnered with it, we were given tips, guidelines, and feedback for our student teaching experience.  One rule our professor had has stuck with me for seven years and counting.  She basically said, "When you show up to school or work and someone asks 'How are you?', you are never to say anything about being tired.  We're probably all tired!  Many people say it without a real consideration so the start of their day has begun with a complaint.  I don't care if you are incredibly tired.  This is your chance to learn how to be a professional and positive, so think of another thing to say."  Believe it or not, it was a real challenge to stop myself from saying exactly what I shouldn't.  SUCH a good exercise!  I carried that practice into my teaching career, but as my life evolved and my profession shifted, I have fallen away from that good habit. 

So how do these two stories relate?  It's about choosing a response.  I don't want to be known as a complainer.  Joy is about choosing an attitude of gratitude no matter what is going on around you or with you.  I've taken some time as an adult to study and understand this character trait especially.  And I think anyone with two brain cells can assume I'm tired.  Five kids or one.  I doubt the number of kids makes much of a difference.  I don't need to have that as the first thing out of my mouth.  My mom used to say, "I'm a mom.  I'll be tired for the rest of my life!"  I'm confident she's right, but that doesn't mean we all need to talk about it and commiserate! ;) Dare to choose a different response to the question, "How are you?"  Of course this doesn't mean you can't be honest.  Last week, I was having a wretched time with one kid's health including a full day at Kaiser.  I could honestly say, "No, I'm not doing very well..."  This response differs from the off-the-cuff-I'm-tired though. The first naturally leads into a prayer request conversation.  The latter is just a short complaint and doesn't necessary lead anywhere.

Several months back, a facebook friend posted a beautiful picture with the caption, "Today is a good day simply because God made it." I don't remember what she said about it, but whatever it was, it convicted me.  When was the last time I said I had a good day?  Not even based on my circumstances but because I was alive and I recognized that God is good!?  I was a complainer! I wasn't having that "great time" simply because I forgot I had a say in the matter.  I forgot to make the better choice.  Whether it was reporting back only the negative dealings with the kids at the end of the day or describing our busyness or back to the "I'm tired..." response, there was not much of or any grateful attitude shining through!

So I asked myself, "What happened to the girl who was widely known for her joyful spirit?  She is caught up with all the negative.  She is forgetting the power of perspective."  Therefore, I'm back to the professor's rule.  I am going to try to choose a more joyful response in my heart and out of my mouth.  You have full permission to call me out if you ask me how I'm doing and I respond FIRST with a complaint - especially telling you that I'm tired! 

The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.

Luke 6:45