Why do you love me?

I've said it before, but I don't know if I've ever blogged it.  So I'll say it now.

I have never grown more in my relationship with God than when I became a parent.

There is more I understand and can relate to: just as I desire our kids to trust and obey, choose love, and yes, even love discipline itself, I imagine our Heavenly Father desires the same from us.  Simple truths of this relational model come out at various times, and they are - by far - my most personal and teachable moments.  

The best, bare bones truth revealed itself tonight, and I was flooded with a desire to share it.  I was finishing up a simple yet effective discussion with Noah about his poor attitude this evening.  I, myself, was in a funk also because I was tolerating the hints of disobedience and disrespect instead of slamming on the brakes when I first saw him slipping.  I recognized that I needed to stop and address things.  After I pointed out some of the problems, he broke down crying and lunged at me for a repentant hug.  He had felt the dissonance too but didn't know how to pull himself out.  I had to sit him down and point out his sin. (Has God had to do this with me?  Absolutely!  And I haven't even gotten to the good part yet!)  Putting a new lesson about truly forgiving the kids' daily offenses and moving on into practice, I said three things to him:

I forgive you.

It's over and done.

We are right again.

I felt released.  He felt released.  More hugs and mommy thoughts like, "Oh my goodness, I can't believe this kiddo is 6 years old already.  I'm so glad he still fits all curled up in my lap; I know this won't last too much longer!!"  Then I said, "I love you." Without any pause or consideration he replied, "I love you too." The quick response spurred me to ask a question.

Why do you love me?

He answered, "Because Jesus loves you." I had every intention of reciprocating the question so I could claim his identity and reassure him of all that yummy love stuff.  But I couldn't.  I literally opened my mouth and just the start of a squeak came out.  Then a moment later after thinking about it I said, "Wow.  I really like that answer."

To sum up Noah's part of the story, I want to note that he was a huge delight for the rest of the evening.  He was back to his quick and obedient, "Yes, mom! Whatever you say!" bits and cooperative spirit.  I learned a lesson about taking a time out to really discuss downhill behavior as a means of stopping it.

But my bigger lesson was hearing why my son loves me.  It wasn't the typical "because you're my mommy!" or "because you make me peanut butter and jelly." It was the most honest answer that I think we forget so often.

Why do you love me? 
- Because Jesus loves you. And if Jesus loves you, I should love you too.
So if Jesus loves me it means I am worthy of love.  

I John 4:19
We love because he first loved us.

That's the most fundamental reason we should love anybody.  He loved us first, so we not only should love others as a response to His love but also because they are loved by Him and worthy of love.

You are worthy of love.
And I love that my Noahbear reminded me of that tonight.